Heard On The Radio
Sorry for the couple days off there. The good ol' stomach bug is running rampant through Chez Leiby. So I've been a tad bit busy!
Last Sunday afternoon, I was out running errands by myself. I had on some women's talk radio station because... well... because I could. They were interviewing a woman who wrote a book about the trend of single women living alone.
The gist of the book was that more women are living alone, outside of married relationships, than anytime before in history. Something like 51%. Certainly there are a lot of reasons for that. More women wait until later to get married now than when our parents were young. Those same women tend to move out of their parents houses as soon as they are out of school as well. (Or at least they should!) And of course there is the sad situation of divorce.
One part of the interview just really irritated me though. The author brought along two women who she interviewed for the book. One of the women was 33 years old and living alone. She had been dating a man for 2 years, and they were engaged.
Seems totally normal, right?
Apparently not. They questioned this woman as if she was some kind of freak to first of all still be single at 33, and second to not be living with her fiancee.
What is wrong with society today, that a 33 year old woman who chooses not to live with a man until she is married is treated like a freak?
Unfortunately we've experienced it ourselves. When Greg and I were dating, there were people who questioned why we didn't live together. They also questioned why when we were not married, we would not share a room overnight when a child was in the house. And I won't even go in to the comments that were made about Greg being 37 and getting married for the first time.
I can't speak for the woman on the radio. But even though Greg and I are far from perfect, we try to do the right thing. We try to maintain good values. We try to set a good example. And we certainly intent to do our best to instill the same in our sons.
There are a lot of 37 year old men who have had multiple children with multiple mothers, while having lived with any woman they could. There are lot of men who wouldn't think twice about shacking up with a woman with a child in the next room. Thankfully I found a guy who was more responsible than that.
Those of us who try to do the right thing aren't the ones who should be treated as freaks. It's all the ones shacking up who should be. That woman on the radio deserved more respect than she got.
Last Sunday afternoon, I was out running errands by myself. I had on some women's talk radio station because... well... because I could. They were interviewing a woman who wrote a book about the trend of single women living alone.
The gist of the book was that more women are living alone, outside of married relationships, than anytime before in history. Something like 51%. Certainly there are a lot of reasons for that. More women wait until later to get married now than when our parents were young. Those same women tend to move out of their parents houses as soon as they are out of school as well. (Or at least they should!) And of course there is the sad situation of divorce.
One part of the interview just really irritated me though. The author brought along two women who she interviewed for the book. One of the women was 33 years old and living alone. She had been dating a man for 2 years, and they were engaged.
Seems totally normal, right?
Apparently not. They questioned this woman as if she was some kind of freak to first of all still be single at 33, and second to not be living with her fiancee.
What is wrong with society today, that a 33 year old woman who chooses not to live with a man until she is married is treated like a freak?
Unfortunately we've experienced it ourselves. When Greg and I were dating, there were people who questioned why we didn't live together. They also questioned why when we were not married, we would not share a room overnight when a child was in the house. And I won't even go in to the comments that were made about Greg being 37 and getting married for the first time.
I can't speak for the woman on the radio. But even though Greg and I are far from perfect, we try to do the right thing. We try to maintain good values. We try to set a good example. And we certainly intent to do our best to instill the same in our sons.
There are a lot of 37 year old men who have had multiple children with multiple mothers, while having lived with any woman they could. There are lot of men who wouldn't think twice about shacking up with a woman with a child in the next room. Thankfully I found a guy who was more responsible than that.
Those of us who try to do the right thing aren't the ones who should be treated as freaks. It's all the ones shacking up who should be. That woman on the radio deserved more respect than she got.
posted by Susan | 7:10 PM
2 Comments:
I agree that it is a shame that this woman's choices were maligned by the host. Her choices are certainly sound and values based. What a shame that she was ridiculed for choosing to live a life that is positive and promotes the sanctity of marriage.
But why should anyone (even though who make not as good choices) be treated like freaks? Wouldn't it be better to provide role-models and evidence of the ways of this woman being healthier and better (e.g., statistics say those who live together before marriage are more likely to divorce) than to just call people names and ostracize them? Just a thought.
Thanks for posting, Erica. I understand what you're saying, and I don't disagree. Perhaps my choice of words could have been better.
We won't raise our boys to think that those people are freaks, or should be treated as such. But we will raise them that the behavior is wrong, and that they deserve better.
Thanks again!
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