Holidays
Can you believe it's October already? Time to start thinking about holidays again....
We tend to be rather particular about holidays. We like them to be meaningful and positive memories for our kids. Sometimes we observe that holidays are stretched to such extremes that the true meaning of the holiday loses it's significance.
My parents shared a great bit of advice with their kids. Actually I remember them telling this story for quite a long time. When they got married, the first year was crazy. Everyone thought that my parents should come to their house for the holiday. My parents tried going house to house. They tried alternating holidays. And then they realized that they were not developing any holiday traditions of their own.
So that led to their big proclamation. They were going to spend holidays at their own home. Anyone who was interested was welcome to join them, but they were going to make their own traditions at their own home.
I am so grateful they did that. I have memories of Christmas, Easter, and Thanksgiving, all in our dining room. We had different people visit for different holidays. Grandparents, Aunts, Uncles. We got to relax, celebrate the holiday, and be a family.
This is what Greg and I are trying to achieve with our holidays. We plan to spend them in our home. Our children will wake up on Christmas and Easter in their own beds, and they won't be shuttled here and there all day long. (Although we do always go to church. After all, THAT is what those holidays are about!)
The other thing we focus on is keeping the holidays to the actually holiday. Christmas is celebrated December 24th and 25th. We don't have full Christmas celebrations starting at Thanksgiving and going through Valentine's Day. That takes away from the meaning of the holiday. Christmas is not about gifts over a 2 month period of time. It is about the birth of Jesus.
And then there are the Hallmark holidays. We only minimally celebrate those. Valentine's Day is usually left at exchanging cards within our family. In fact this last year, we spent that evening making homemade Valentines in the kitchen. No gifts, not even between me and Greg. Same thing with Mother's Day and Father's Day. We usually try to do something nice together as a family, but we generally do not do gifts. We rarely even exchange gifts on our anniversary.
Admittedly, I do tend to get a bit excited about birthdays. After all, those are each person's one special day of the year. I really like to try to make my boys (all 3 of them!) feel great on their birthdays! But again, we do not have multiple birthday celebrations. We have the kid's party, and whoever can make it can come. But we don't have the kid's party, the "this-side-of-the-family party", the "that-side-of-the-family party", etc. There's one party. Otherwise, it's overload!
Some people might think I am a bit too particular about the holidays. But I want my children look back on their childhood with memories of happy holidays. They are days to reflect, to celebrate, and to relax. Together. As a family.
We tend to be rather particular about holidays. We like them to be meaningful and positive memories for our kids. Sometimes we observe that holidays are stretched to such extremes that the true meaning of the holiday loses it's significance.
My parents shared a great bit of advice with their kids. Actually I remember them telling this story for quite a long time. When they got married, the first year was crazy. Everyone thought that my parents should come to their house for the holiday. My parents tried going house to house. They tried alternating holidays. And then they realized that they were not developing any holiday traditions of their own.
So that led to their big proclamation. They were going to spend holidays at their own home. Anyone who was interested was welcome to join them, but they were going to make their own traditions at their own home.
I am so grateful they did that. I have memories of Christmas, Easter, and Thanksgiving, all in our dining room. We had different people visit for different holidays. Grandparents, Aunts, Uncles. We got to relax, celebrate the holiday, and be a family.
This is what Greg and I are trying to achieve with our holidays. We plan to spend them in our home. Our children will wake up on Christmas and Easter in their own beds, and they won't be shuttled here and there all day long. (Although we do always go to church. After all, THAT is what those holidays are about!)
The other thing we focus on is keeping the holidays to the actually holiday. Christmas is celebrated December 24th and 25th. We don't have full Christmas celebrations starting at Thanksgiving and going through Valentine's Day. That takes away from the meaning of the holiday. Christmas is not about gifts over a 2 month period of time. It is about the birth of Jesus.
And then there are the Hallmark holidays. We only minimally celebrate those. Valentine's Day is usually left at exchanging cards within our family. In fact this last year, we spent that evening making homemade Valentines in the kitchen. No gifts, not even between me and Greg. Same thing with Mother's Day and Father's Day. We usually try to do something nice together as a family, but we generally do not do gifts. We rarely even exchange gifts on our anniversary.
Admittedly, I do tend to get a bit excited about birthdays. After all, those are each person's one special day of the year. I really like to try to make my boys (all 3 of them!) feel great on their birthdays! But again, we do not have multiple birthday celebrations. We have the kid's party, and whoever can make it can come. But we don't have the kid's party, the "this-side-of-the-family party", the "that-side-of-the-family party", etc. There's one party. Otherwise, it's overload!
Some people might think I am a bit too particular about the holidays. But I want my children look back on their childhood with memories of happy holidays. They are days to reflect, to celebrate, and to relax. Together. As a family.
posted by Susan | 7:07 AM
1 Comments:
I agree that holidays should be about the actual reason behind the holiday, i.e. "Jesus is the reason for the season," but in my family we are spread out across the country so we do things a little differently. We celebrate Christmas as a family (my parents, my brother and his wife, other brother, grandma and us) Thanksgiving weekend or another weekend before Christmas. We do the actual celebration, big dinner, gifts, etc. so we can celebrate together. Then on Christmas we do our own nuclear family celebrations or with in-laws (gotta say it is nice to not have to pick and chose each year - your house or mine?) and those in the same city as my parents have a 2nd celebration. It is a really nice way to celebrate the holiday and not the date on the calendar for us. I think if you are most comfortable in your own home, that is fantastic and especially if you are close enoough to your families that they can come over that is the way to go. There was a short time when my whole family lived in the same city and it was great to celebrate on the 25th, but we have had to learn to be together and have Christmas dinner (and the birthday cake for Jesus of course!) on a day that works for all of us.
I hope your holidays are merry, bright and filled with warm memories whenever and wherever you celebrate them!
Post a Comment
<< Home