New Birth Statistics
Government officials reported today that out-of-wedlock births in the United States are at an all-time high. This makes me so sad.
The report looks at different age groups. Such births among teens are actually down. I hope that this is a good thing. I hope that teen births are not just down because the girls are having abortions. That would not make it a better report. But the story doesn't address this.
I truly hope that teen births are down because teens are not having sex as much. I don't understand what's going on with the mentality of some parents today, who actually EXPECT their teens to have sex. I have even heard the statement, "I want my daughter on birth control as soon as she starts her period so that she can develop a healthy appreciation for sex."
People! Sex is an adult act with adult responsibilities. I recognize that there is no way to ensure 100% that a teen will not have sex. But that doesn't mean you give up either. I can assure you that in my house growing up, my parents made it perfectly clear that it was unacceptable and immoral behavior. And it made a difference. I was not one of the girls in my teen years running around having sex. Ever.
But back to the out-of-wedlock births statistics...
Most of these children will grow up in a house that does not have two parents. Let's face it, even if they're living together at the time the child is conceived, or even born, chances are that the couple will not stay together. 50% of marriages end in divorce anyway. Cohabitation increases this percentage. Having a child before getting married puts even more stresses on the couple. Most of these couples are doomed.
Kids need two parents, and they need them around all the time. Our society seems to act as if fathers are disposable. But I really believe that there are on a very small percentage of fathers in this country who are not fully capable of being great fathers. Some may not be motivated to do so. But no matter what the relationship is between the mother and father, in almost all cases, the child deserves the involvement and love of both parents.
I've heard so many examples of mothers talking about what bad-news their children's fathers are. I don't know if they are saying these things in front of their children, but my guess is that even if they are not, the children know what the mothers think. The bottom line is, you picked him. You had sex with him. And whether you like him or not, in almost all cases, your child deserves to have him in their life.
I can feel some empathy for the 35+ year old unmarried, successful woman who fears she will not marry soon enough to have children. I can understand why they may take alternative means to have children without a father.
But it's the younger girls and women I am concerned about. We need to go back to teaching our young people that sex is something special. It is an adult act with adult responsibilities. If you are not fully able to take on those responsibilities between the mother and father, you should not be having sex. Period.
It's lives we're talking about here. We need to make sure that we are raising our children to be mature, responsible adults before they engage in behaviors that may affect the life of another -- especially a child. Those parents who are teaching their kids that it's okay to have sex as teenagers, well, all I can say is that I hope those kids have some better influences in their schools and communities.
The report looks at different age groups. Such births among teens are actually down. I hope that this is a good thing. I hope that teen births are not just down because the girls are having abortions. That would not make it a better report. But the story doesn't address this.
I truly hope that teen births are down because teens are not having sex as much. I don't understand what's going on with the mentality of some parents today, who actually EXPECT their teens to have sex. I have even heard the statement, "I want my daughter on birth control as soon as she starts her period so that she can develop a healthy appreciation for sex."
People! Sex is an adult act with adult responsibilities. I recognize that there is no way to ensure 100% that a teen will not have sex. But that doesn't mean you give up either. I can assure you that in my house growing up, my parents made it perfectly clear that it was unacceptable and immoral behavior. And it made a difference. I was not one of the girls in my teen years running around having sex. Ever.
But back to the out-of-wedlock births statistics...
Most of these children will grow up in a house that does not have two parents. Let's face it, even if they're living together at the time the child is conceived, or even born, chances are that the couple will not stay together. 50% of marriages end in divorce anyway. Cohabitation increases this percentage. Having a child before getting married puts even more stresses on the couple. Most of these couples are doomed.
Kids need two parents, and they need them around all the time. Our society seems to act as if fathers are disposable. But I really believe that there are on a very small percentage of fathers in this country who are not fully capable of being great fathers. Some may not be motivated to do so. But no matter what the relationship is between the mother and father, in almost all cases, the child deserves the involvement and love of both parents.
I've heard so many examples of mothers talking about what bad-news their children's fathers are. I don't know if they are saying these things in front of their children, but my guess is that even if they are not, the children know what the mothers think. The bottom line is, you picked him. You had sex with him. And whether you like him or not, in almost all cases, your child deserves to have him in their life.
I can feel some empathy for the 35+ year old unmarried, successful woman who fears she will not marry soon enough to have children. I can understand why they may take alternative means to have children without a father.
But it's the younger girls and women I am concerned about. We need to go back to teaching our young people that sex is something special. It is an adult act with adult responsibilities. If you are not fully able to take on those responsibilities between the mother and father, you should not be having sex. Period.
It's lives we're talking about here. We need to make sure that we are raising our children to be mature, responsible adults before they engage in behaviors that may affect the life of another -- especially a child. Those parents who are teaching their kids that it's okay to have sex as teenagers, well, all I can say is that I hope those kids have some better influences in their schools and communities.
posted by Susan | 4:56 PM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home